Finally, a church figures out how to get adolescent boys interesting in church...Halloween Book Burning. Amazing Grace Baptist Church figured nothing peaks the curious mind of a young boy quite like a huge bonfire of books. It's nice to see that not all fascists forms of celebration have gone away.
It still baffles me why some religious zealots find it hard to believe it when outsiders question their methods, beliefs, and sanity. Fine, burn some satanist music like jazz and oldies but goldies. Most people can clearly hear the devil when enjoying a John Coltrane album or Four Tops record. But since when did 'ol satan swoop in and corrupt southern gospel and christian contemporary?!? I think these all get burned.
I guess things are just so confusing now with boys wearing jewelry, and girls wearing pants that you can be sure anything is what it claims to be. Things are so bad that the church is burning all translations of the Bible that are not the King James Version. That's right New King James Version, into the flames. Joining those blasphemous rags will be Billy Graham, Mother Teresa, John Piper and numerous other scribes of satan.
If you're not sure whether your book or CD is infected with satan, I think it's safe to say the fellas at the church will let you burn anything. So load up the family car, empty your library and enjoy the cleansing fire.
Oh, and there will be BBQ and fried chicken.
Wonkette story
Posts
Man, I always knew there was something dangerous about Mother Theresa and Billy Graham. I'm glad somebody has confirmed my fears.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI made a bad comment, but I remembered your mom reads. Leave Mother Theresa alone, I say.
ReplyDelete